Web Copy Review Request

[Alex Honey: Int Design]

Hi All

I'm in the process of giving my site a bit of a face lift and would be really grateful for feed back specifically on the services copy that is on it at the moment.

Ive had a copy writer work with me on, however Im not confident that we've hit the mark. So I thought Id turn it over to you guys to get some of your great no holds bared feedback!

I will look at the design, function, etc at a later point. Just focused on the copy at present.

My business specialises in residential interior design.

Our clients are generally Brisbane home owners between the age of 38 - 50.

One bracket have been in their home for about 5 years with a young family who are now school age and so they are looking to re-furbish.

Alternativley another market are couples whose children have left home and who have purchased a property and are needing help to transition and put their stamp on a new dwelling.

The key things I want the copy to do are

Allow a potential client identify their issue or challenge
Inform a potential client how each service works
Clearly state the price of services (where we can work on a fixed price)
Appear professional, competent and approachable

http://www.sterlinginteriors.com.au



Im looking forward reading comments and experiences of the content that have the time to share.

[The Copy Chick]

Hi Alex,

First of all, I'd strongly recommend reducing the contrast of your text against the background. White on black looks stylish, but it's very difficult to read (my eyes are still bleeding). Even a pale grey on black can make a huge difference, while retaining the same look and feel.

With that in mind, I only read the home page - and immediately picked up 2 typos in your welcome message (check the spelling of "reflects" and the missing apostrophe in "Whether it's.."

I also found some of the wording just a little clunky in parts. Some minor reworking could fix that quite easily.

The overall message comes through in the introductory snippets (again - I didn't read further due to the contrast issues) so there's at least enough to encourage readers to click through and find out more.

I hope that helps.

Cheers,
Anna

[gossipism]

sup alex

wow. theres a tonne of text in your services. like, metric tonne. i think theres WAY too much and it borders almost on fiction in some parts, seriously, like reading a story. I was reading it, finding i was getting to the bottom, then thinking "what was this about again"?

im probably thinking from my minimalist self but i like things to go,

Services:
a. we do this
b. we also do this
c we can do this if you want.
d. we've just introduced this.

pretty much in those number of words (well maybe not that little).

if you got straight to the point, and got straight to the price, i think it would be better.

you pricing also gets lost and your use of BOLD doesnt make it stand out any more. maybe a table at the bottom of each service would help?

your an interior design so let your pictures do the talking.

in all seriousness, a single paragraph on each with some kick a$$ photos would be better than too much text.


hope it helps (sorry if a bit harsh.)

[Alex Honey: Int Design]

Hi

Thanks so much for taking the time to share your thoughts. Overall your feedback and tips reflect my feelings about the copy - which means its gotta be re-done.

I really appreciate your help.

[Warren Cottis]

Hi Alex

I totally agree with Anna and Gossipism especially about the white text on black...but also, one leg does not make a table.

You have individually elegant elements on your home page but collectively they are stressful and squashed and that's exacerbated by the white on black.

If you are going to focus on one leg now called 'great copy' at least give it room to breathe so it can do it's magic

[Warren Cottis]

Hello again Alex

I was just looking at your e-book opt in and I think you are asking for too much information from the visitor.

Just make the First Name & Email Address mandatory and build the relationship by regular communications.

If they fill in more fields then well and good but why would you have "Country' as mandatory?