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Join Date: Mar 2012
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
| | Re: website review appreciated
Hi again Terry
Please do be aware that I am just some guy, not a professional, so if you can afford it I would suggest you get yourself a copywriter if you find yourself unhappy with your own efforts.
With that in mind I think your front page looks a bit sparse now. It's good that you've removed the things I thought looked wrong with the text but it needs to be replaced with something else.
When I write text for my site I start by listing what points I want to get across, in bullet form in a Word doc. I then flesh it out by putting my points in sentences, again I like to keep it in Word so it checks my spelling.
I tend to waffle so I leave it for a day or so and when I revisit what I've written I can usually cut it down by about half. Kepp your messages short or people will lose interest. Catch them as quickly as possible, they're busy and they want to know what you can do for them. It's hard when you have a story to tell.
Gotta take my daughter to school!