Attention All Working Mums

[Rhia]

Hi Everyone,


I hope this email find you well. I was having a discussion with a girlfriend a while back that centred largely around the fact that we couldn't go to work without the "mummy guilts".

We are both strong independant women who love our work and derive much of our self confidence and sense of self-worth from our careers. However at the moment we seem to be torn- we can't seem to be able to do what we do without feeling like a bad mum.

When I first had my son I stayed at home with him fulltime. Unfortunately I didn't know what to do with myself and struggled to reconcile my new role (and lifestyle) with what I believed to be true about who I am. I began to get depressed. I love my son more than anything however it wasn't until I went back to work that I began to reconnect with my self and the "fog" began to lift.

The worst part about this is that I truly believed that I was the only person in the world that felt this way and that there must be something wrong with me. Now that I am starting to talk to people- other mums, I realise that I am not.

My friend and I have decided that we are going to start a project. We would like to create a blog or 'online community' for working mums. Somewhere for mums to go for support and to know that they are not alone.

The reason for my post today is to ask the working mums out there to share your story... Something like "A day in the life of..." A brief 500 words (or as long as you need really) account of a typical day in your life- your work, your family, the drama, the good bits and the bad bits.

If you would like to submit something please PM me and we'll go from there. I would really for people to get involved.

Thanks and have a great night,

Rhia

[Janine Madafiglio]

Hi Rhia,

I think your project sounds like a fantastic idea. Working mothers will really benefit from what a community like this has to offer.

I know many mums who have struggled with the idea of returning to work, their desire to do so and the feelings of guilt that have surrounded that. I also know that many mums who have gone back to their careers or have found ways to re-invent themselves in their work (starting their own business for example), are much happier, and their families have benefited from their decision in many ways. But there are also many who are struggling with conflicting emotions around their decision as well as trying to cope with the juggling act of balancing work and family.

In my experience as a coach for mums (along with my own experience as a mum myself) the unique set of challenges that working mothers face are often overlooked by their partners, employers and sometimes even their own friendship networks. To be able to hear other working mums’ stories and to know you are not alone is sometimes all it takes to alleviate the feelings of `mummy guilt`.

One of the aims of my business is to help mums find the clarity to make the decisions that work best for them and their families so they can confidently get on with enjoying a balanced, fulfilling life, regardless of whether they decide to work or be a stay at home mum.

Rhia, I would love to hear more about your project. If you would like to chat further about it please feel free to get in contact with me.

Janine

[Shade]

Like BubHub?

[karmkids]

I really like this site!

[BrightBiz]

Karmkids I am so sorry your partner put you in this situation, cherish those little ones because they need a strong mum like you to be there for them.

The first thing to do is for you to think about your skill set.

What can you do that could be of help to others? It could be anything from ironing to typing and anything or everything in between. If you create a list (and perhaps share it here if you'd like) then I am sure we could help you find some ideas about things you might be able to do to earn a little extra to help your family.

Good Luck on your journey

[Janine Madafiglio]

Hello Karmkids,

Firstly, seven children wow! Growing up as one of six myself I know how busy it must get at your place. I understand that this is a really tough time for you. You sound like a loving and dedicated mum and I am sure your children are especially benefiting from that right now. It’s also really important to take care of yourself during this time. I hope that you have some good friends or family who are offering you strong support.

Regarding your question about starting up a business, I agree with BrightBiz. The first step is to look at your skill set. I would suggest you make up a list of skills gained from previous jobs as well as any you have developed as a mother. Mums have many skills that are transferable to business, multi tasking being one and I am sure you are an expert at that from managing a house full of kids! Do you help out at your children’s school? Perhaps you have helped organise fundraisers? By doing a skill set analysis you can begin to get some clarity around the type of work that suits you best.

Here are a few sites you might like to check out to help you get started with work from home business ideas:

http://www.bizimums.com/
www.connect2mums.com.au
www.businessmumsnetwork.com.au
http://www.hiremymum.com.au/

I would be happy to brainstorm some ideas with you further. In the meantime, best of luck with everything. I hope it all works out for you.

Hi Karmkids,

How are things going?

I'm not sure I have any good advice for you - yet - but I wanted to say that I'm glad you posted on the forum - sharing can make all the difference and I hope you stick around (I'm new to the forum myself).

I'm also a mum trying to make something out of nothing although I only have one!

Keep thinking positive, things WILL work out ..in their own way

Oh, and do you ever look at www.etsy.com? If you're crafty at all, it can be a great way to make some extra income, and a great place to find some inspiration. And there's eBay to consider too. I'm sure you've thought of that.

By the way, what area are you in?

Re feeling drained, loss of appetite etc. I'd venture to say these are probably very natural responses to your situation, but remember there's help out there, such as the Women's Information and Referral Exchange (WIRE) which I think still exists. You can call for a chat or for specific info, such as free or low cost counselling in your area.

Jen

[Rhia]

Hi Karmkids,

Wow you have quite the story. 7 kids is amazing!! You sound like an extremely strong person which will help you out through this journey.

There are a number of avenues that you can consider in terms of working, though I can see that it would be a lot harder for you as a single mum. There is a site that I have come across which offers family friendly employment called www.careermums.com.au

Someone before me mentioned ebay. This is definitley an option as are other forms of internet marketing- such as affiliate marketing etc. Something else to consider may be party plan etc. I know that some women make really good incomes from party plan these days.. they are no longer really daggy and offer some really great stuff- I was just reading a brochure the other day from one that sells candles etc and they were really cool.

Depending what your skills are you may want to start your own business from home. If you had admin skills perhaps setting up as a virtual assistant or something will offer you the flexibility that you need with the kids. You may find that you will be eligible for the New Enterprise Incentive Scheme through centrelink.

Please do not feel ashamed for needing support- this is obviously really tough and you are doing the right thing by asking for help and ideas. We have all been through times where we need someone to talk to. make sure that you look after yourself- you have 7 children to think about too and they will need you to be healthy.

I think that you should consider going to see your GP. If your stress (whilst completely understandable) is causing physical symptoms such as loss of apetite etc then it is time for the doctors.

Relationships Australia is also a really good avenue for support. They have loads of resources available that may give you ideas you wouldn't have otherwise thought of and the counselors really do offer fantastic support. I have been to them before and I am so glad that I went.

Good Luck with everything and I hope that you come back and chat. Keep us posted as to how you are doing etc.

Big Hugs

Rhia

[Rebekah - Your Architect]

Hi Rhia,

Please, keep us all posted with your progress. I personally am not a mum, but am a solo flyer who plans to be a mum sometime in the next 5 years. I'd be very interested to her stories of those who have done it before.

[Burgo]

Karmkids, I read your post earlier like when you first put it up and for the first time in a very long time I was stuck for words, and thats not like me.
Your one very strong person and reading the preceeding posts youve been given some really good advice, and support.

So what is your passion ( apart from the magnificent 7). What would you feel comfortable doing to bring in some much needed cash.

I can appreciate posting in the " attention working Mums' but hey there are a lot of guys on this forum, that had they read the post may have responded.

The forum is quite unique in that we have people from all walks of life different educational backgrounds ethnic religious and cultural but we have gelled into becoming a close family of friends.

For what its worth we are here to try and help, so give some thought to what you are passionate about and lets see how we can develop you passion / dream into reallity.

So now its up to you, tell what you see


ps Sorry Riha for sidetracking.