Mum's at work - Research help

[Jennifer.collier]

Hi,

I am a Career Coach and after a number of years in the recruitment industry, I saw time and time again that mums returning to the workforce were struggling to either get permanent work, the type of work they wanted and discrimination. Lots of women I met were struggling, stressed or depressed about it.

There is no training or discussions had with young women about the pros and cons of managing your career and parenthood and as such thousands of professional women struggle every year trying to balance the 2. I have spoken to women who had their first child in their mid to late 30's and wished they'd done it sooner, young women who had struggled to hold down a full time job to keep their family (and hardly saw their children grow up) who wished they'd waited.

I am currently undertaking some research to speak to mums (of any age) about their experience with balancing career and parenthood, what they did that worked, what they struggled with and what they would change. My overall aim is to then present this information to young women in the form of workshops to give them an understanding of the benefits of each option and to develop a support network for them.

I am looking for mum's who are willing to take the survey and have a chat with me about their experiences. If you are interested or know anyone who would be, please contact me on jennifer@incitecoaching.com.au

Thanks in advance!!

[LeelaCosgrove]

Wonderful idea, Jennifer!

You're right - there is no education around this. I found the whole thing so confusing that I just gave up on the whole kids thing altogether ... too many variables ... too many pros vs cons ... it makes my head hurt just thinking about it ... whereas business is something I can easily get my mind around.

If in your travels you (or anyone else on the site) come across any "older" (say women in their 50s or 60s) professional women who CHOSE not to have children (i.e. not women who wanted children but couldn't have them - women who made the decision not to go down that path) - would you be able to pass on my contact details? I've been wanting to write a piece about this for a long time - as well as have conversations with them for my own, selfish reasons - it's just finding these women that's the difficult part!

leela(at)businesswritersanonymous.com.au

Thanks!

[Burgo]

Leela I have a couple of friend both retired now who chose not to have children, I'll pass your contact details on to them.

[MediaMuse]

Hi Jennifer

I may be able to contribute - I started working motherhood when my son was one-year-old due to financial strain of not working full time. By the time he was two I was separated from his Dad. I continued to work full time up in employment until last year when he turned 4. This was always with no financial support from his Dad.

During this time, (from 2-4) I was working in highly paid government contracts both through agencies and through government contacts I had. I desperately wanted well paid part time roles. There was none. The money only paid for the childcare, and the rent we were paying to live near the city where the work was - we didnt feel the excess it gave to lifestyle. I was too busy and stressed and run down to enjoy it too.

All roles were demanding and I struggled, especially during times I fell ill with the normal colds and flu and more (I was run down). Then of course between 2 and 4 kids fall ill a lot, so I was off work (unpaid) looking after him. At all times, I felt guilty - either for not being the best mum I could be, or not being the best employee I could be.

Due to the fact that a lot of communications managers are in their early mid-thirties like I am, these contracts I did were maternity leave contracts. All my employers then promised me there was an opportunity to job share once the contract was over and the maternity leave employee returned to work. All of them came back full time due to their own mortgage stress, even though their husbands worked full time and were also well paid professionals. I envied them! But couldnt get my head around a house payment being more important than being at home with your child.

I understand this is a personal choice, however, I chose to move out of my home and rent it out, and rent a smaller unit I could better afford. This is another price I paid for being a single working mother - not living in my own home that I loved.

I did this manic dance up until last year, when I realised that I had one more year before my son went to school (prep) - and that I would regret it if I didnt get a job that afforded me more time with him before school took over my choice to.

Last year I left my job, started a NEIS small business management course through a job agency, and started Media Muse. If flexible jobs were not going to come my way - I was going to make my own!

I dropped my son back to part time preschool and worked hard from my office-in-a-loungeroom to build up the business. I did have to get assistance from Centrelink for some of this time. But I believe I was sensible. I lowered my standards, budgeted madly and stopped all unnecessary spending. Guess what - we coped! Sometimes on only $100 a week once rent was paid, for all bills including food and petrol.

My son is now in his fifth week of prep at a private Christian school (the one I went to and always dreamed I could send him to) and I work my business between his prep hours (8.30am to 2.45pm). I do extra at night when I need to.

We are happy, I am happy, and I am not only building a thriving business that I love waking up to each morning, but my son knows his mum is there for him. Today I am keeping him at home due to him having early signs of a cold, he will rest and I will do little bits of work as I can. My clients will be none the wiser.

That's my story, and I hope it will help you with your research somehow.
Marnie - Media Muse

[Jennifer.collier]

Marnie,

Thank you for your story. this is EXACTLY why I want to do this research. So many women have struggles and its about time somebody did something!!!

Wishing you all the best

Jennifer

[MissieK]

I started my business (www.businessmums.com.au) because of a number of reasons, but one main one was I was told I couldn't run a business and raise a family!

I have contacts with a number of parenting sites if you are looking for people to talk to. Just email me melissa@businessmums.com - I'd also be happy to participate - I have 2 small boys aged 5 & 7 and had my first at 24.

Melissa