How your work impacts your self-worth

For those of us who love what we do, our sense of self-worth and work can become intimately intertwined.

When you care deeply about excellence, it is hard to distinguish between doing a great/worthwhile job and being a great/worthwhile person.

Consider the following: The client is always right. We never turn down work. We must do anything to make every client happy. These assumptions are biased towards the other, at the expense of our selves. They do not allow for the vast differences in our personalities, beliefs and understandings. These are commonly the cause of disputes.

Business is personal, something that much current business wisdom denies. When jobs don’t go as well as we’d like, it can damage our self-worth and with the attendant flow-on effects, the quality of our lives.

Here are three rules I try and work by:

1. I compete on value, not price

For every job, I charge what I believe to be a fair amount for my experience, time, effort, insights and attention. I see the payment of my fees as the acknowledgement of and respect for the value I bring to a business.

I once had a potential client who expected me to help them develop a vision for their business, create a brand, write a communications plan, develop a custom look-and-feel website and provide training for the same price as they would pay a web-only designer to implement a website using off-the-shelf templates.

When I turned down the work, they could not understand why I was charging so much “for a website”. They clearly did not value the strategy and planning work that they sought me out for.

Some clients simply see only the concrete deliverables – a logo, a website, a cake. They do not see, and therefore cannot value, the less tangible such as experience, foresight and planning.

2. I go for happy projects

A few years ago, I said no to a big project. An existing client had invited me and two other associates to respond to a tender. Having relied on us to deliver mission critical work for them for many years, they wanted us to bid for this new project.

Unfortunately, the person in charge of the tender did not. He made assumptions about our incompetence from day one; telling us how quickly technology changes, and that we should learn about things called “content management systems”. The tender document was obviously written to favour certain multinational advertising agencies.

When we raised questions about flaws in the project strategy – questions that would have saved them time and money – the only response was “you need to play by the rules and stop asking questions”.

Working under such a cloud of clear disrespect would have been demeaning to my self-worth. The results would have suffered. So we abandoned the tender response process altogether.

I like the saying “follow your bliss”. I am learning to trust my feelings.

3. Personal attacks are unacceptable

Disagreements are part and parcel of working with others – thankfully most of the time they lead to stronger relationships and better results.

Sometimes, however, they can turn nasty and cross into personal attacks. This can range from direct verbal abuse to endless noxious barbed emails.

I have always taken a “work with; not for” approach. I focus on delivering excellence, and not on pleasing the client or anyone else for the sake of doing so.

We can and must choose to value ourselves. If we don’t value ourselves, how can we then expect others to?

We cannot possibly be our best when we are unvalued, disrespected or psychologically insecure. Our work will suffer and so will our self-worth. It is lose-lose all the way.

What lessons have you learnt about valuing yourself within your business?

Zern Liew helps his clients build beautiful businesses by practically innovating across their Branding, Communications, Processes and Systems.

12 Nov 08

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8 comments | Add your own 1 2 | Next» View all»

Zern you have eloquently expressed a sentiment that many soloists have learnt the hard way. Follow your gut instinct and ‘just say no’ if you are not being valued.
I have some clients who tell me, I charge about 1/3 of what they expect me to charge, and I save them so much money. Other prospective clients ring and tell me I charge about 5 times what they expect me to charge. Do I spend time explaining to prospective clients why they should want steak when they are only prepared to pay for hamburger?
When I accept a prospective client, and I suspect like you I do not accept all of them, I feel like an integral part of their support team and want to work WITH Them.
The philosophy that you have shared with us is both altruistic and productive, benefitting our fantastic community as a whole!! Heather Smith from Bris Vegas | Read my articles
Zern, this article couldn't have come at a better time for me!
After recently launching another business, I was mucked around by a prospective client. I wanted to clinch my first client and against my better judgement, I agreed to work with him - only to be bitten in the bum.
Not two days later, I did in fact sign up my first client; a lovely, understanding person who valued my time and work, who appreciated the entire process involved.
What an absolute difference, not only to my work - but to my life. I have certainly learned my lesson, aptly reinforced by this article. Amanda Jephtha from Sydney
Thank you Heather and Amanda for your kind comments. When I first conceived this article I had doubts about whether I should write it. Thanks for validating my decision to! Zern Liew from Sydney | Read my articles
Excellent article Zern - trust your gut instinct. This year I have learned through various life events and illness what really matters and I no longer worry about clients who don't appreciate me. I know I am worth far more than what some prospective clients try to tell me. I just don't work with them or I make it clear what the job is going to cost them if I do it and then ask, 'do you still wish me to go ahead'? To my surprise, they usually say 'yes' and I can then do the job without resentment to the best of my ability and everyone is happy. Karen Curran from Springwood NSW
Accolades from me too, Zern, for a great article!
Whilst the truth is that we must demand that our value is appreciated, its equally true that we have to 'sell' our value - when we simply expect others to automatically appreciate our value, we do ourselves, and our prospective clients, an injustice. Grant Hyman from Sydney | Read my articles
Zern, your article is so well written and obviously comes direct from the heart, well done! The only thing I would add is to trust that the big wide world wants you to be happy and rewarded for your talents; in my experience when you say no, you often get to say yes three times over! Dan from Australia

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