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kerrytaka
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Hammock Financial Group, post: 82630 wrote:
I am also confused about who you are what the purpose of the newsletter is for. I guess if you are sending it out to an existing client base they are likely to know who you are already (?) however you have lots of call outs to ‘pass it on’ and so at least for that reason, I think who you are (a name would help!) and what you do is vital!
Yes they are an existing client base and yes the ‘me’ clarification is necessary

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I get the impression from your articles that you are promoting positivity and making a change in lives and/or the environment. Some of your wording comes across to me as “You should do this!” I think you have the opportunity to use very happy and friendly language. Talk more about the benefits of the links you want to watch. Something like “check out such and such a link – we loved it here and wanted to share it with you” etc.
Nice approach -like this!

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Rather than “things you should try to do in July” you could simply say: “Things to do in July”. That seems nicer and doesn’t come across as much as if I am being lectured to.
Thank you for pointing that out

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And finally, I think if you could break up your articles a little more into sections.

For instance, you could have the Things to do in July as one section, then have some kind of section break or colour block, and then have “Pass this on” section, then section break again and “think about” section etc. This makes it easier to read piece by piece etc and could help you work out what kinds of sections you want to include in each newsletter.
Nice :)

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Overall, I think there is still a bit of work to do before it is client ready and I think Johnson is spot on about spending time to get to know your audience and understand what they would be looking to get from a newsletter from you.

Yes thanked Johnston for his approach to getting the who/where etc questioning happening

Many thanks Megan and I hope you don’t mind responding in italics as I have done.

~ Kerry