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Ilya
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Hi Graham,

Don’t worry about the spam. If you write a nice personal email with a soft pitch, nobody is going to complain.

You can use mail merge process to generate a large number of customised emails or use something like ToutApp, Yesware or Sidekick to customise a large number of emails.

On another note, simply asking for a link will have a very low chance of success (probably zero) unless you have a very valuable resource or a clear benefit to offer to your target.

Brian Dean has some interesting methods such as Moving Man to alert site owners about broken links or outdated resources then asking for the link. He even has a great email script you can use. Have a look:
http://backlinko.com/live-case-study

Please note I am not affiliated with Brian Dean and Backlinko in any way.

All the best.