Home Forums Tell me straight… To work with my old man or not?

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  • #999840
    Melbbuildconst
    Member
    • Total posts: 9

    Hi,

    haven’t been on here in ages, been lurking though. Anyway the advice here is always helpful (mostly laughing.gif). Just want some ideas if you’ve been in a similar situation or even if you haven’t.

    I know often trades can run in familys and this is the case for me. I’m working in remodelling and want to pick up more work, however every time I get more work or a lead, my old man who i work with, who is also a carpenter that does remodelling, insists he comes with me, then quotes the job extremely high (due to being a licensed builder with 40 + years experience) and more often than not we price ourselves out of the work.

    Any advice on how to go off on my own? It will infuriate him if I go behind his back and go measure up and quote a job without him.

    Any advice?
    __________________

    Nick


    Aspiring Home builder

    #1221561
    bb1
    Participant
    • Total posts: 4,472

    First bit of advise is mind your P & Q’s, not really the appropriate forum for that, go join facebook. If I was thinking of hiring you and I happened across this thread, I wouldn’t take you on board.

    I’m not old fashioned or a religious freak, it’s just not appropriate around customers.

    #1221562
    Paul – FS Concierge
    Moderator
    • Total posts: 3,115

    Hi Nick,

    If you really want to proceed with change, you best bet is to have an open and honest conversation with your dad. You have to lay your cards on the table so to speak.

    Good luck.

    #1221563
    meladjusted
    Member
    • Total posts: 2

    My husband has recently left working with his dad in construction. He, over time, talked with his dad about moving elsewhere as he had learnt all he could with him. Would your dad understand if you said you want to go out on your own so you become self sufficient at running a business, quoting etc?

    #1221564
    eagleeye
    Member
    • Total posts: 31

    Maybe try and be honest with him – no doubt you are going to hurt his feelings – so be as gentle as you can.

    You could possibly approach it with taking a different geographic area?

    No doubt as a parent he will be hurt so tell him that you still care about him to try and reduce him being potentially offended.

    As always – start with the positives and then introduce the changes you would like to see.

    Always be honest though – being dishonest will make it ten times worse and could create a rift.

    #1221565
    trug3nt007
    Member
    • Total posts: 6

    I work with my old man too and have a great relationship through it… luckily.
    We’ve always been able to talk things through, regardless of differences of opinion. I’m indebted to him for all he’s done for me, especially for putting up with me.
    Despite our countless and seemingly never ending head butts we’ve always make communication the absolute priority. In all aspects.
    Like the others before me have said, you just have to put those big boy pants on and let him know. It’s been a while since you’ve asked this, so I hope you’re past it, but he will appreciate it in the end.
    Fathers and son’s working together is a special thing but in the end he is your dad and he probably still looks at you like his little falls he taught to catch.
    Be straight mate and a big hug at the end will wipe that slate clean straight away.

    Good luck for the future..

    #1221566
    trug3nt007
    Member
    • Total posts: 6
    bb1, post: 267643, member: 53375 wrote:
    First bit of advise is mind your P & Q’s, not really the appropriate forum for that, go join facebook. If I was thinking of hiring you and I happened across this thread, I wouldn’t take you on board.

    I’m not old fashioned or a religious freak, it’s just not appropriate around customers.

    Just out of interest mate… where are the P’s and Q’s?
    Totally disagree.. perfect place for that question.

    #1221567
    bb1
    Participant
    • Total posts: 4,472
    trug3nt007, post: 268266, member: 116828 wrote:
    Just out of interest mate… where are the P’s and Q’s?
    Totally disagree.. perfect place for that question.

    You may notice that the OP has edited the original post and taken out the P&Q’s following my post.

    It wasnt the perfect place for the question as originally written.

    #1221568
    trug3nt007
    Member
    • Total posts: 6
    bb1, post: 268281, member: 53375 wrote:
    You may notice that the OP has edited the original post and taken out the P&Q’s following my post.

    It wasnt the perfect place for the question as originally written.

    And I disagree.
    Bet you’d be a real hoot to work for.

    #1221569
    adamgraham101
    Member
    • Total posts: 5
    Melbbuildconst, post: 267640, member: 114788 wrote:
    Hi,

    haven’t been on here in ages, been lurking though. Anyway the advice here is always helpful (mostly laughing.gif). Just want some ideas if you’ve been in a similar situation or even if you haven’t.

    I know often trades can run in familys and this is the case for me. I’m working in remodelling and want to pick up more work, however every time I get more work or a lead, my old man who i work with, who is also a carpenter that does remodelling, insists he comes with me, then quotes the job extremely high (due to being a licensed builder with 40 + years experience) and more often than not we price ourselves out of the work.

    Any advice on how to go off on my own? It will infuriate him if I go behind his back and go measure up and quote a job without him.

    Any advice?
    __________________

    Nick


    Aspiring Home builder
    i would just start to pick up a few jobs and slowly leave the nest
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