Shifting the vibe
A while back I went against my intuition and bought something from a telemarketer.
My husband Rob was suspicious from the outset, but since the accommodation package in question included discounts on hotels in Canada and the US (where we go to visit family), and incorporated a 10-day cooling off period, we decided to go ahead with the deal.
Maybe Rob’s pessimism rubbed off on me, but I had a weird doubtful expectation, and in no time at all, I was wondering if I’d been scammed.
Since I know that I always get what I expect, I shouldn’t have been all that surprised with what happened next.
The paperwork associated with the deal turned up, and sure enough it wasn’t what I thought I’d bought. There were no discounts on hotels in the US and Canada included in the package at all. I’d been sold something under false pretences.
Two weeks of phone calls and Rob’s pestering later, I still hadn’t had any response from the sales team.
By now, I was bracing myself for a fight. Clearly they didn’t want to honour their agreement. My blood started to boil.
"The good stuff comes rushing in when you’re feeling good. Not when you are pushing for a result, or struggling or battling."
Knowing there was no possible resolution while ever I was in this state of mind, I looked for ways to shift the vibe.
I know it’s not a great social media strategy to vent your spleen on Facebook, but in my desperation for a shift, that’s exactly what I did, making a general appeal for advice:
“Experiencing extremely poor customer service from a hotel service company – am extremely frustrated!!! Trying to shift the vibe – any tips? (I just want to wring their necks and spank them!)”
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And that’s when the miracle occurred.
As soon as I typed ‘spank them’, I had a little giggle. The image of spanking the sales rep was pretty silly – and shifted me out of the kick-down-doors-foot-stomping-rage I’d been in just moments before. It was my doorway out of the feel-bad vibe.
It may have only been a tiny crack in my resistance, but that was all I needed to pivot and change direction.
And (of course!) while I was laughing at the imagery of spanking the naughty sales rep, the customer manager finally called to apologetically give me a refund.
Here’s what I learned:
1. Monitor your expectations: I picked up Rob’s vibe that all telemarketers were out to rip me off, and I didn’t set a better intention instead. For example, “I only attract people and services that are for my highest good” might have been a more effective expectation.
2. If caught in a funky situation, notice your own role in it: Part of me loved the drama, the gearing up for an altercation, the idea of being the hero in my own story.
I’ve done drama enough to know that it ends with everyone losing an eye. Or at least a bit of ego. Good reason to try another approach and stop fuelling the fire.
3. If stuck in a bad-vibe situation, it’s up to you to shift it! For me it was the use of the word ‘spank’ that shifted gears. The response from my friends on Facebook added to my feel-better vibe and the conversation is still going! I don’t even care about the incident anymore; the spanking conversation is hilarious!
That’s when the good stuff comes rushing in – when you’re feeling good. Not when you are pushing for a result, or struggling or battling.
My challenge to you is to become conscious of whose expectations you’re picking up on, and where you’re getting hooked into drama. Then do something to shift the energy.
When you’re in a funk, how do you alter the vibe? Please share your ideas with me so I’ve got more in my toolkit to use next time.