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Self-appreciation: Disable your downplayer

- June 15, 2010 2 MIN READ

I’m no good at receiving compliments. I’ve trained myself to say ‘Thanks’ instead of ‘It’s nothing’ but I’m usually still a bit uncomfortable when I receive praise. Okay, very uncomfortable!

So why do I downplay?

I’m caught in the trap of the false virtues of modesty and humility. And I suspect I’m not the only one who struggles with self-appreciation!

Why do I call modesty and humility false virtues?

Because they don’t serve our life purpose.

You see, when we downplay, we tell ourselves, ‘I’m not good enough. I am not deserving of this.’

When our downplayers are turned up high, all we’re doing is vibrating unworthiness. We’re rehearsing and reinforcing ‘I’m not good enough yet’.

And if my purpose is to help leaders transform the world by first transforming themselves, how on earth is that going to happen with the vibration of ‘I’m not good enough’?

It won’t work. Ever.

To inspire others to transform their awareness and personal influence I need to have my confidence and self-worth dialled up high. Powerful positive energy is engaging, influential and contagious.

‘I’m not good enough yet’ is not.

Humility and modesty are false friends that unhinge our personal power. Playing small, thinking small, and feeling small serves no one, no cause, no thing.

Big thinkers and strong leaders need to think big, feel big, and play big if they want to get big results. Downplaying is small thinking, small feeling, and can only lead to small results.

Self-appreciation is not arrogance

When I appreciate the fact that I love writing and generally what I write is okay… (Whoa! See how I did that? Generally what I write is okay?). Rewind: I’ll try that again, this time with my downplayer off.

When I appreciate that what I write is powerful and engaging, I’m not being arrogant; I’m appreciating my strengths. And I’m being grateful that those strengths serve my purpose in the world by inspiring others in their own transformation.

That’s not arrogance. Arrogance would be something like, ‘I’m an awesome writer and you’re not. Don’t you wish you were me?’ (Not exactly inspirational, is it?)

Self-appreciation doesn’t raise you above others – it raises your vibration. It makes you more influential and more positive.

Turn up the volume on your up-player

Self-appreciation makes you a vibrational match to your vision and makes room for it to arrive in your life.

By practising appreciation – and then dialling it up a notch – I tune in to success and accomplishment, and create exactly the environment I want for me, my results, and my clients.

For example, next week I’ve been invited to speak to a group coached by the highly acclaimed personal development guru Mark Joyner. Here’s how I’m appreciating that opportunity:

Wow! That’s awesome! I’m so cool! I attract the top end, big guns in my field – that’s who I play with now! I’m delighted to share my powerful message of personal transformation using my unique and practical system. I‘m a guru too. I’m an amazing guru! I have the talent and vision to uplift thousands and I‘m attracting these opportunities daily.

Phew. That wasn’t as easy as it looked! But there’s no room for limiting beliefs here. I’m totally committed to my vision. Personal transformation is a high energy, big playing field and I am stepping up as a key player.

What about you? What accomplishments and opportunities is it time to up-play? (And when you tell us about them, don’t forget to turn the volume up on your self-appreciation dial!)