Fear is a powerful guidance system isn’t it?
When we feel it, we use it to guide ourselves away from danger. In our business and personal lives, fear keeps us inside the lines. It keeps us on the paths we perceive as safe and stops us from upsetting anyone along the way.
I find it hard to break away from fear-based conditioning. As a child I was raised to fear the alternatives to doing what I’d been told or asked. Parents, teachers and friends warned me what would happen if I didn’t follow the path they recommended or expected of me.
As if they knew.
I’ve been training myself to identify my own fear-based conditioning. It’s astonishing to stop and notice some of the core beliefs that affect my behaviour and decisions. I’m startled at some of the ingrained beliefs, previously unquestioned, that have me operating inside the lines.
In coaching business owners to find their authenticity and authority voice, first I need to help them identify their fears (in order to find the lines they need to break).
For example: I have a client I call ‘the polite one.’ They wish to communicate more confidently and powerfully. They want to be more visible and reputed in their industry and market, and don’t understand why they aren’t already.
I reflected that perhaps it was their fear of upsetting and offending others that was keeping them out of authenticity and authority. They were unable to come fully into service because they’ve lacked the courage to tell the truth where it matters.
Are you afraid to tell the truth to others? Are you even afraid to tell it to yourself?
Is it time for you to find your Dangerous Voice and use authentic communication?
- Dangerous Voice is created when you say the things that need to be said, even if they cross the line and disrupt the status quo. These are things that need to be acknowledged in order for others to see what is, not what everyone imagines.
- Dangerous Voice is required in your industry, your country and on our planet. Much needs to change and change-makers need to be heard.
- Dangerous Voice is so-named because, before you use it, you will feel fear. The voices in your head will warn you ‘what will happen’.
As if they know.
But, and I promise this, after you use Dangerous Voice, you‘ll be exhilarated by the freedom and independence it brings.
I recently spoke on Why Your Writing Matters to the World in a blogging workshop at my son’s high school. I shared stories about people whose courageous writing had inspired me.
Each teenager in my blogging workshop then chose an issue they wanted to impact. Most sat with friends. One youth sat alone, working quietly. After they’d written their blogs, I asked each person to share their subject. One had written about climate change, one on animal cruelty and another on the lack of women in power.
The quiet youth paused a moment before sharing: “I wrote about bullying and lack of acceptance of transgender kids in school.”
I looked at him as he spoke and realised I had known this boy in his primary school days: as a girl. I was utterly moved by his courage and articulation in the workshop.
It was as if he knew what would happen.